Maverick Sinks His Balls into Many Holes…… A Mini Golf Review

As many of you probably already know, I was down in the Outer Banks last week. If you have never been down there I would strongly recommend going, especially since it’s the home of Dennis Anderson, the creator of “Grave Digger.”

While we were there, the sun was out all week and I didn’t die of sweat, so that was nice. Plus, the house we rented was only a two minute walk from the beach.

They also have these souvenir shops called “Super Wings,” which for the record doesn’t sell any wings. These shops are located just about every 1.5 miles. Seriously, I saw more Super Wings shops down there than I see Dunks when walking around Boston.

Another fun fact about North Carolina is that they definitely love their mini golf. I think we drove by at least 6 mini golf courses just on our way to the rental house. While we were there we only had time to hit 3 different courses, so I will rank them accordingly.

  1. Professor Hackers Lost Treasure Golf prof hacker

First off, Professor Hacker can go fuck himself.

This might be the hardest mini golf course that I have ever played at and unsurprisingly I came in dead last. This course had an Indiana Jones type of feel which was pretty fun. It had 36 holes; one Diamond course and one Gold course. The names of each hole were very fitting with the lost treasure theme.

This course had a hole where the cup was on the top of a hill, so if you didn’t hit just right your ball would roll off.

Needless to say I took a 6 on that hole…..

  1. Jurassic Puttjurassic-putt-outer-banks-nc-600x400-001

When pulling into the parking lot I thought for sure this was going to be the best place we visited. I mean before you could even park you could see the dinosaurs from 300 yards away!

This course obviously had giant dinosaurs all over the place however, every single hole was flat and boring. Not one dinosaur was actually on the course either! They were just placed at the side of each hole instead of actually being on the green. I would have paid a stupid amount of money to putt through T-Rex’s legs.

Also, at this course they only took cash and had a sign that said “NO REFUNDS” hand written in marker. I should have lowered my expectations after seeing that.

Although this course had many disappointing aspects, all of the dinosaurs had signs next to them with fun facts and the giant statues were cool enough for me to push them past that fraud Prof. Hacker.

Thankfully I didn’t come in dead last this time! But I was second to last…

  1. Paradise Fun Park paradise1-mqmzvcvuzsgr2y9gfjaaemhg1t3lbgmeebo0qbhsto

This 36-hole pirate themed course was easily the best course of the week. Its main attraction isn’t even the mini golf but instead the go-karts, which unfortunately we didn’t get to ride. But nevertheless the course was fun and there were plenty of obstacles. One hole was even inside a pirate ship which was wicked pissah.

What I liked most about this course was that it had removable flags at each hole. Now I’ve never seen that on a mini golf course before but it’s so preposterous that I loved it.

At this course I once again came in second to last… I’m starting to think that maybe I’m just not that good at mini golf.

Obviously I have to work on my mini golf skills but even if you are terrible like me it’s a fun activity with friends and even more fun when you’re drunk! So call me any time you want to sink some balls into holes.  I prefer only 18 but if we have enough time, the 36 holes will do.

– Maverick

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